I wonder if you, like me, can remember mornings in your childhood where all you could think about was getting dressed. Maybe there was a special outfit. Or maybe getting dressed was the last 'task' standing in between you and somewhere awesome you couldn't wait to go.
I can bring back a few memories of little me getting ready in the morning. The night before the first day of school for 1st grade. I set out my light blue top and blue pants with tiny pink dots and white high top shoes. I remember laying the shirt above the pants flat on the floor and sitting still for awhile envisioning myself in that outfit. My attachment to those hand-me-down items was palpable. I was happy.
I can also remember at a young age learning the lessons around color matching. I can still remember my purple sweater with red hearts. I know every girl, of all ages, who passed through the '80's had something red and purple, and probably geometry came into the equasion too which shapes being the rage then.
But not suprisingly, at that age I had no clue thousands of people owned purple sweaters with red hearts. Mine was special. Mine was lovely. And I wanted to wear it all the time. I recall one day my mom having to explain to me that I couldn't wear my favorite skirt with my favorite top. 'I get that you love them both alot, but they aren't for wearing on the same day...' was the message.
The details around the skirt are a little fuzzy. I'm thinking it was pastel, maybe striped, I don't know for sure but I do remember it beginning to sink in that it the two pieces maybe weren't the best mates...
This morning I woke up excited to get ready. In a rush to get dressed you could say. Not because I am headed to Disneyland or because I bought a great new wardrobe item. In fact it's 6am on a Saturday and I would rather not be awake and heading to a dr appointment, but those are the facts.
The last few months have brought with them arduous battles of bulges. Yes, plural. I've honestly been living in yoga-ish clothing (though make no mistake I hate yoga) as it has been the only items in my wardrobe that have fit. The idea of having 10 out of 500 pieces of clothing that fit may sound concerning to you. And you may have noticed I haven't worn jeans or anything beyond a tank top or man sized t-shirt of late. And while it's been hot and sweaty here in Washington, that isn't the reason for the simple, reduced attire.
I haven't gotten obese. I realize that. But, my wardrobe unfortunately was filled with alot of items that simply had no flex room. Anyone who's fluxuated in size knows that there are certain weights or sizes that bring with them tighter clothing that just frankly have little flexibility.
And so my wardrobe would not forgive the 10 or 15 pounds I'd added. I had been flucuating, losing 5lbs and then gaining them--and then awhile back it just kept creepin up. Ya know, one step forward (a good workout and healthy dinner) and two steps back (that 4th meal from taco bell at 9pm after a full dinner) and before you know it I was banished from anything except my 'sloppy wear.'
I've been working out hard lately. And not giving in to the munchies. On vacation I had access to a gym and lots of free time on my hands so my workouts were extended and consistent. And since returning last week I've been building on that progress and the weeks before.
At some point in the last 3 months inevitably there was a day where I wanted to wear my jeans and sadly, trying to do so brought bad news. And I did try a few times after but those attempts served as a wake up call that it was more than just an lb or 2 that stood in my way.
Mind you, we are NOT talking about 'skinny jeans' (which is a term I don't care for, btw) we ARE talking about my 'everyday jeans' - which might help you vicariously feel the sting of dissapointment I lived with having my 'normal' duds out of the 'working zone'....
Anyway, as I ran my hands around my midsection in the past few days (which I do often, multiple times daily) to take stock of how much extra is there, I felt progress. The tire is deflating if you will. And yesterday I decided that today would be the day that I would retrieve the jeans and learn the truth of whether they were ready to have me back.
I am wearing said jeans as I write. That's the good news. The really good news. The bad news? Well, they are a bit tight. True, they are tight jeans, which is why this whole problem surfaced to begin with, but today they're really tight. But I can fasten them! And I can get away with wearing them. And I am stoked. Just a few more days. Probably by next weekend they'll fit like they used to.
I'm thinking I may put up with the inevitable marks around my mid-section which I will no doubt have by noon today, just because I am that ready to go out into public in something other than gym-ish materials.
I suppose the upswing to being headed to a dr appointment which will involve disrobing is that by the time I get there, today I may want to take my clothes off.
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