Both Aacck and Aawww

Sometimes I think Survivor has got it all wrong sending people into the jungle. Sure there's something to be said for having to weave one's own underwear and out-swim that strange naked guy (who's challenged in the weaving department) to reach the massive floating deck and bouy that are for some reason situated out in the amazon river.

Most of you know I am a part-time nanny. It's a hell of a job. I love it actually. But some days, boy does it have a way of testing that love. There are moments I flirt with insanity--but the good news is--that passes as quickly as it came. On the plus side, there is no long-standing stress as with projects at the office. No heart-less HR people. But, I wonder if there should be a 'childcare component' to the Survivor competition.

Today, I was so stretched I experienced angst-induced laughter. You know where you're so crazed you begun to bubble over with giggles?

Yea, today was tough. Funny thing is, now that I've been away from the kiddos for 2 hours, had a good dinner and am starting on a beer, I already miss those two boogers. Aren't pressurized situations supposed to be bonding? I think I can attest to that.

Here is an outline of my day:

Scene 1 / Beth and Ellie with play-doh

Beth: Ellie, I brought you some new play-doh
Ellie: Does it come with cutting tools?
Beth: No, cuz your old set has cutting tools. We can use those.
Ellie: I think the cutting tools are in that box.
Beth: No, see how the box is tiny? It can't fit cutting tools, but you already have some right over here.
Ellie: Where are the cutting tools?
Beth: Right here.
Ellie: Where's the rhinoceros one?
Beth: There isn't one.. you mean the horse?
Ellie: This is a rhinoceros.
Beth: Actually thats a horse.
Ellie: Beth, what is this?
Beth: It's a horse.

*Griffen in background begins to cry, Beth begins to tend to him*

Ellie: Beth can you play with me?
Beth: I need to check on your brother.
Ellie: Beth can you sit next to me right here?
Beth: I need to sit by Griffers for awhile.

*2 minutes of silence*

Ellie: Can you please play with me? Sit here.

*Etc. Etc. Repeat.*

-End Scene-

Scene 2 / Beth and Ellie at Sbuxs

Beth: Ellie, do you want anything? Something to drink or eat?
Ellie: Look at my shoe Beth.
Beth: Do you want juice? hot chocolate? a muffin? (takes Ellie out of stroller)

*Ellie does not answer and runs with abandon to table and chairs*

Beth: I'll have a 1% SFV latte.

*Beth joins Ellie on cushy chairs*
*Beth briefly gets up to retrieve drink and returns*

Ellie: Where's my drink?

*Beth walks back to cashier* (So much for thinking Ellie didn't want anything)

Beth: What drinks do you recommend for kids?
Barista: Hot apple juice, blended smoothies, maybe strawberries and creme?
Beth: We'll try the strawberries and creme.
Barista: Good choice. You'll be a big hit with that one.

*Beth returns with Ellie's drink*

Ellie: Where's my hot chocolate?
Beth: Look! This is pink and has cream in it. It's yummy!
Ellie: I want hot chocolate. (To her credit she said it matter-of-factly, not as a whine)
Beth: Try this instead!

*Beth tastes and says, "Ooh, it's good."* (FYI, that was a lie. I don't like cream in my drinks)

Ellie: I don't like it.

*Beth sets drink down and sighs heavily*
*90 seconds of Ellie jumping on chair*
*Ellie picks up strawberries and creme and drinks it*

Beth: Do you like it now? Is it good?

*Ellie does not respond. Continues drinking*
*Ellie continues squirming*
*Ellie decides to put drink down but misses table next to her chair*
*Drink splatters everywhere*

Ellie: Beth! My drink!

*Beth proceeds to ask barista for wet rag*
*Barista proceeds to keep Beth waiting*
*5 minutes of waiting*
*Beth contemplates leaving mess and leaving shop if they don't hand over a damn rag soon*

Ellie: The floor is wet Beth!

*Beth returns with rag and mops it up*
*Beth realizes rag wont be enough and gets 10 napkins too*
*Beth kneels down to further wipe up*

Ellie: (while sitting on chair) Beth can you stand up on the floor please?

*Beth ignores Ellie who doesn't realize she can't stand up AND clean*

Ellie: Can you stand up please?

**This might be where I began to go crazy**

Ellie: What are you doing?
Beth: Cleaning up the mess.

Ellie: Why are you wiping Beth?
Beth: Because when we (you) make a mess we (I) have to clean it up.

Ellie: The floor, it's still dirty.
Beth: No, thats just water. It'll dry.

*Beth begins to wearily and uncontrollably giggle*
*Beth returns rag to Barista*

Barista: You are so sweet. Most people just jet out and let us deal with the mess.

*Beth wishes 'kid drinks' came in kid-friendly cups*
*Beth proceeds to snap a few photos of Ellie with phone in between more questions and squirming*

Ellie: Can I see the pictures?
Beth: Ellie, your sunglasses are on up-side-down. (Beth fixes sunglasses)

*Ellie takes sunglasses off*
*60 seconds later Ellie puts them on again, up-side-down again*

Ellie: Is my game waiting for me at home?
Beth: Yes it is.
Ellie: Is it at home?
Beth: Yes it is.

*Beth proceeds to check time and begins process of leaving sbux for home*

*Etc. Etc. Multiply. Repeat.*

- End Scene -

There is more I could write about my day. Of the adventures of Ellie's teething baby brother-who didn't nap ALL day and cried alot and didn't want anything and didn't get better with Tylenol. Of the other questions from Ellie repeated again and again, over and over. Oh how many times I answered her questions on whether cherries have seeds and where the seeds go when you eat them... Etc. Etc.

Tomorrow is a new day. I'm hoping for just a few less questions and a few less tears from baby Griffey. But even if it's a repeat of today, I'll find a way to love it. I've always thought I would be good on Survivor.